Three years ago, the mother of Carmen Uth began to suffer from dementia. Also for the daughter of a difficult and stressful time began. At the absolute low point, she realized that she must change her attitude. Carmen Uth was six sentences, which gave her new strength.
If relatives suffer from dementia, are unable to cope the most. The a escape, the others suffer with it, the next time you are impatient and aggressive, and others resign or are living through a feeling of chaos. With all this, you will feel bad and cannot give the loved one what he needs: patience and love.
So it was with us when my mother three years ago, increasingly began to suffer from your form of dementia. It was difficult for her to accept the changes. She was becoming more and more aggressive, what are the care values in addition to difficult. My mother is a rampage during the night in the senior citizens ‘ home, in which it was housed, so much so that she had to be laid in the clinic with a closed Dementia unit.
The Situation of my mother worsened, more and more
There was the shock. The access to the closed Station was only from the interior. In the hallway, an old man was lying on the ground, a neglected Omi ran barefoot through the hallway, the people seemed to be “confused “. From the rooms came the Whine. And the smell…
This mess should now be the new home for my mother, she’s a smart, well-groomed Pensioner was prior to their illness, exhibited their works of art in Baden-Baden, Strasbourg and Frankfurt…
To The Person
Carmen Uth founded your company’s chance motion in 2011, and accompanied entrepreneurs, leaders and Teams to understand the “language” of Emotion and the Power of emotions and full of character.
It got even more intense. The doctor in charge informed me in the evening, by phone, that any coercive measures were necessary. My mother would refuse talks, food, Drink and especially drugs.
I had to change something
That night I lay sleepless. The past weeks had also impacted me greatly. I realized that If I wanted to continue to be there for my mother there, I had to change something. Otherwise we would break both of the disease.
So far, all was dominated my thoughts of fear: the fear that my mother would recognize me, the fear of death and the fear of not enough for you to be. The thoughts that helped me but gave me no power.
6 sets, the me new courage give
I began to search for better thoughts. You came to me step-by-step that night and the following weeks. I share them with you. Maybe they also give you so as to me in this difficult Situation, a new force and courage:
“I look at the things that my mother still – and not always only on what’s not.”
Whenever I see my mother visits, there is something New, what has disappeared from their memory. I would put on my focus, I would be flat and powerless.
That’s why I put the focus on what works: you eat yourself – no matter how. She always goes alone to the toilet – no matter how. It still runs itself – no matter how. So think and feel gives me strength pure.
Dementia: help for relatives
Relatives of dementia sufferers can turn to in case of problems and questions to the Alzheimer’s phone of the German Alzheimer’s society 030 – 259 37 95 14 or 01803 – 17 10 17 from Monday to Thursday 9-18 and Friday 9-15 clock.
“It’s not the number of my visits, but on how much time I’m bringing”
Daily visits with my mother to work for me as an entrepreneur – as probably for most, the not work. In the final stages of that crisis time, I realized how my love and devotion fell in my daily Visit. So when I see two or three times per week with her, I leave my worries far behind me and dedicate myself wholly to it: games, Mandalas coloring, Singing, with the family whatsappen, pampering with Lotion – so we are close to and love and trust flowing profusely.
“I have to do everything alone.”
As in any area of life, a good network is everything, especially in the elderly houses. I know the whole Team, I’m top informed and the others know that someone is constantly present. In addition, it gives me the luxury, if I can hold for a couple of days on a business trip am with this network via the Whatsapp contact to my mother – awesome! And also friends and Acquaintances, I invite again and again, the joy of my mother is so beneficial.
“I can of myself to my emotions.”
Every goodbye is getting harder for my mother. You just don’t want me to go and weeps, and wants me to run after. This requires the utmost discipline on my part. What would it help her if I would be emotionally buckling?! Every Time I leave think of me, so she calmed down and I have to say each Time: in the Morning, I’m back. In part it is true. Because with my voice – by phone – I am with her and mentally anyway. When she has calmed down then finally something – no matter how long it takes – I smile at you and go with the words: I love You.
Write us about your experience with dementia
Also, you have people in your vicinity who is suffering from dementia? You tell us your personal story by E-Mail to [email protected]
“It is not the dementia weakens my mother. It is understood thieves, robbers, and steal their memories.“
Where the journey goes with my mother, is clear. This Negative spiral is an image easier to bear: The robbers are around, and pieces of the puzzle of your mind to call. Very undercover. Fortunately, these mind thieves leave their most valuable treasure – the emotions – untouched. Mom can feel everything, even if you can’t Express Most of it in words. On this level, I can always reach you and that is a very great comfort. This connection between the two of us hopefully until the very end…
“Even when the mind clouds over, My mother will always love me from the heart.”
Even my mother recognizes me. But the day will come where I will be for you to Strangers. Before this day, I have respect for. But I know that will not change the feelings of my mother for me never, even if you can’t show it to me.“
In the meantime, my mother lives in a seniors home. The Doctors were able to many of your medication discontinuation and prescribed a more effective medication for dementia. My mother was not “so high!”, as most people think. The “cure” was so successful, I could bring you back to the home, where they are well provided for.
But of course, there are always low points. Then I will make clear to me is: Who benefits from negative thoughts and feelings? Then I decide: This voice I’m not available, and concentrate on what still works! I know that I can give my mom all of my love, if my “love vault” is too full of grief and pain is superimposed.
All of the articles for the series “life with dementia” can be found here
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Three years ago, the mother of Carmen Uth began to suffer from dementia. Also for the daughter of a difficult and stressful time began. At the absolute low point, she realized that she must change her attitude. Carmen Uth was six sentences, which gave her new strength.
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