Does your friend secretly hate you?

‘So, you agree, you think you’re really pretty?’

Any self-respecting millennial knows that this iconic line comes from Regina George in Mean Girls.

When Cady Heron accepts her frienemy’s compliment, Regina puts her on the spot, making her feel awkward and uncomfortable.

From ‘you can’t sit with us,’ to ‘stop trying to make fetch happen’, the 00s classic is full of examples of mean girl behaviour disguised as friendship.

And while you might think these kind of so-called besties only exist in North Shore High, you’d be wrong.

In fact, according to TikTok, withering put downs, backhanded compliments and sneaky tactics are common in real-life friendships.

In one video that has five million views, titled, ‘Story time of my friend that did not like me’, user Becca Moore, said: ‘We’d be at a dinner and someone would be like, “your makeup looks good today.”

‘And Ashley would be like, “didn’t you get Botox last week?”’

People in the comments section were quick to relate. One said, ‘We all have one of those friends’, while another wrote, ‘they’re a hater, not a friend.’

ashley was a guy’s girl she’s not into the girly stuff. it’s not her fault #storytime #friends #enemies #awkward

Trauma expert and therapist, Stephen Joseph, tells that toxic friends like this can wear us down.

He says: ‘Good friendships provide us with mutual affection where we feel free to express ourselves and in which we feel understood and cared for. We can count on such friends to have our back.

‘Sadly, it is also possible to have friends who are more likely to talk about us behind our back. These are friends who put on a façade of friendship.  

‘They may do this for a variety of reasons, often because of envy, or because they get something out of the relationship with us. They may even enjoy the power they have over us.

‘Such relationships can last for years without us noticing, but they will wear us down over time.’  

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